In a move that doesn’t surprise anyone at all, Elon Musk’s long-awaited 700 million dollar superyacht has finally debuted, and its destiny couldn’t be more suitable. Enter the scene: Donald Trump, the man who truly believes in “posing the best”, even if that means redefining the concept of “the best” with all of gold. 

Called “Starliner Supreme”, Musk’s yacht has futuristic design features that scream “technological billionaire”, with champagne bottles powered by solar energy, artificial intelligence bartenders who only prepare martinis, and a landing platform for SpaceX transshippers (because of course). Critics call him “a floating sanctuary of excess”, the perfect place for someone like Trump, whose affinity for golden interiors rivals that of King Midas himself.

Nearby sources claim that Trump has no doubts about making an offer when the yacht leaves the market. “It’s big, it’s beautiful, it’s the best yacht ever built. People say it’s the most fantastic yacht, créanme”, says Trump to those around him, before adding: “Nadie loves the yachts more than you. Nadie”.

As the yacht sets sail, the world watches with great anticipation, wondering if this will mark the beginning of a new chapter at an absurdly opulent expense, if it will be just another episode of “Ricos Haciendo Cosas de Ricos”.

One thing is certain: this yacht has found a captain who will inevitably take him to the unexplored waters of the extravaganza. Bravo, Mr. Musk and Mr. Trump, humanity gives tribute (from our oar boats).